Pfizer Claims Vaccine Will Reduce Average Daily Child COVID Deaths From Almost Zero To Almost Zero
NEW YORK, NY - In a moment celebrated by all hard-working lobbyists, Pfizer announced that the COVID-19 vaccine will reduce average daily child COVID deaths from almost zero all the way down to almost zero.'These are phenomenal results. Our internal studies have proven a microscopic benefit to an ev...
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HOLLYWOOD, CA - Dune director Denis Villeneuve has received alarming news: Legendary Pictures greenlit Dune: Part Two. Unfortunately, now that means Villeneuve has to read the rest of Frank Herbert’s seminal science fiction novel.'Oh no!' Villeneuve exclaimed as he rummaged through his closet for th...
Denis Villeneuve Scrambles To Read Second Half Of Dune
AMERICAN FORK, UT - Kyrsten Fribsey, a local mom and recovering shiplap addict, reportedly began wondering if she might be transgender after she drove around town to run errands without incident.Suspicions that she may actually be a man trapped in a woman’s body began to well up inside her after she...
Woman Who’s Good At Driving Wondering If She Might Be Transgender
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Speaking at a press conference early Tuesday, White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki reminded American citizens that they would be able to afford food if they had kept the 16 cents saved on July 4th. 'As a reminder to all Americans, Biden’s robust financial policies led to incredib...
White House Says You Would Be Able To Afford Food If You Had Kept The 16 Cents You Saved On July 4th
