You gotta love the diplomacy of the Spartans. After Philip II of Macedon invaded southern Greece and received the submission of other key city-states, he turned his attention to Sparta and asked whether he should come as friend or foe. The Spartan reply was "Neither." Losing patience, he sent the message: "You are advised to submit without further delay, for if I bring my army into your land, I will destroy your farms, slay your people, and raze your city." The Spartans replied with a single word: If.