SAN FRANCISCO, CA—San Francisco Mayor London Breed has asked all the homeless residents of her city to please poop at home as coronavirus spreads throughout the nation."Please, we urge the homeless residents of our great city to please poop in their homes during this crisis," she said in a speech af...
babylonbee.com
U.S.—The party known for being loving and tolerant of everyone also wished for the death of their political opponent this week, with many Democrats on social media erupting in celebration as Senator Rand Paul announced he had tested positive for the coronavirus."Love everyone, unless they are on the...
babylonbee.com
WASHINGTON, D.C.—As Republicans and Democrats in Congress bickered over a fiscal relief plan, President Donald Trump held a press conference to unveil a much simpler plan. “IT’S A GIANT MONEY CANNON!” Trump exclaimed with excitement as he pulled out a giant bazooka-looking device. Trump then explain...
babylonbee.com
U.S.—The party known for being loving and tolerant of everyone also wished for the death of their political opponent this week, with many Democrats on social media erupting in celebration as Senator Rand Paul announced he had tested positive for the coronavirus."Love everyone, unless they are on the...
babylonbee.com
WASHINGTON, D.C.—As Republicans and Democrats in Congress bickered over a fiscal relief plan, President Donald Trump held a press conference to unveil a much simpler plan. “IT’S A GIANT MONEY CANNON!” Trump exclaimed with excitement as he pulled out a giant bazooka-looking device. Trump then explain...
babylonbee.com