An Anatomy of Proportion

There are five levels of mammary proportion, just as there are five levels of phallic proportion. Fair is fair, after all. This is just my opinion on the matter, and a break from political commentary for the moment. I hope it entertains you as it does me.

Of the phallic, the levels begin with the Tadger, the Penis, the Dick, the Dong, and the Schlong. Realize that these are my labels, but I feel they apply quite well. Tadgers are tiny, almost cute, and may even retract to ridiculously small length; they can even retreat inside a man and look something akin to a vagina when flaccid. Penises are the average, everyday phallic that your man on the street usually has. Longer than the Tadger, shorter than the rest, but nonetheless still useful. The Dick is named such because men of this length often brag about it, without realizing they're only in the middle of the pack; and can be real dicks about it, pun intended. The Dong hangs low, and while it can take two hands at most to handle, it has not achieved monstrous status, where the Schlong is something women actually fear for it prodigious girth and/or length. Having a Schlong is literal big-dick energy. Most owners of Schlongs go into porn, no matter how plain their appearance otherwise. 

Of the mammary, the levels begin with Tits, Breasts, Boobs, Bossoms, and Bazooms. Obviously, Tits are small and cute, but not in the same manner of their phallic counterpart the Tadger. Women want Tits, men want Dicks, on average. Tits don't get in the way, they're almost always perky, and never more than a handful. Breasts, on the other hand begin at the handful and go up from there. Usually perky, though some sag a little. Boobs definitely sag unless they're plastic, and then they just look ridiculous in my opinion. More than a handful, up to two hands per boob. Bossoms definitely hang, are usually elongated, and are typical on most mothers because of how anatomy functions. Bazooms are those mammary that are beyond big, and can even droop well toward the belt-line. If you encounter perky Bazooms, there is most definitely surgical magic at play. 

Guys and Gals have their preferences as to which they'd like to have and which they'd like on their partner, of course, but for the average, in my experience, Girls are proud to own mammary of all kinds, but natural ones are truly to be admired. Guys are proud of their phallic members no matter the size, but are most proud when they do not have to resort to pills and potions to enhance their size. of proclivity toward what is desired in a partner, I've found guys prefer their female partners to have Breasts rather than anything else, though Tits are actually more popular than you'd think. Similarly, Gals like guys packing a Penis more often because the size is not laughable nor of particular fright. This is, once again, within the realm of my experience and observation. Outliers exist in all categories, as with any system.

I, for instance, and particularly fond of Tits, but love all manner of mammary. I'm not a snob when it comes to women's chests. For my own part (excuse the pun), I am not going to reveal my particular length nor girth status, only to say that I am proud that it functions per normal without enhancement. Infer what you wish from this, I really don't care. I have, on occasion, wondered what it would be like to own a Schlong, but what man hasn't? If you have any logic in you, you can likely work out for yourself my personal proportions, anyway. It's not what you're packing, it's how you use it; I'll leave it at that.

It's alarming to me how many fights have been waged over comparing the proportion of one's anatomy against another, but entirely unsurprising when you get right down to it. Mine's better than yours might as well be the Human motto. Everyone has a baser covetous nature in their primordial self, so it's no great shock that people should war over whose is better or who has what. Which is probably why Transgenderism is such a controversial topic, if we're completely honest. #JustSayin

I hope you enjoyed this break from the political theater we have been entertaining of late and remember: We're all mad here, some of us more than others. 

#SizeMatters #MammaryAndPhallacy #ThanksForTheMammaries #BigDickEnergy #Don'tSendNudes #Mine'sBetterThanYours #MadeYouLook