Wednesday Jokes!

High Winds

An old lady was standing of the deck of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind.

A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?"



"Yes, I know," said the lady tersely, "I need both hands to hold onto this hat."



"But, madam, you must know that you are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest.



The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, any part of my body that you see is 85 years old. But I just bought this hat yesterday!"

Parking Space

An elderly lady was stopped to pull into a parking space when a young man in his new red Mercedes went around her and parked in the space she was waiting for. The woman was so upset that she went up to the man and said, "I was going to park there! Why did you do that?"



The man was a real smart aleck and replied with a smirk, "That's what you can do when you're young and bright."



Well, this really upset the woman even more, so she got into her car, backed it up and then she stomped on the accelerator and plowed right into his Mercedes.



The shocked young man ran back to his car and asked, "What did you do that for?"



The little lady smiled at him triumphantly and said, "That's what you can do when you're old and rich!"