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Incels are a symptom, not a problem. The problem is a gynocentric society.

BigManOnCampusMay 7, 2018, 9:53:16 PM

Significant problems always exist that we are not fully or persistently aware of. Most of the time, this is a good thing as the chances of disaster are low and it is not worth our direct time (as our time alive is limited) to fix something that really doesn't need to be fixed for 100-200 years. If the water main under your house is surrounded by tree roots that are trying to get in, that is a problem for future you, but it's likely not worth ripping up your foundation to deal with it today. When the first hints of the problem manifest, such as reduced water pressure during a shower, we may notice, but we generally don't react. Eventually the pressure drop gets to the point where rinsing your hair takes too long and the toilet tank takes too long to fill. At that point the problem has gone on so long that if you don't act quickly, you may have to do drastic changes to your house just to fix the problem.

Male sexuality is much like this. The biochemistry of being a human male generally ensures that men will try to procreate with just about any physical specimen of a woman. This doesn't mean that men don't have a beauty ideal, but that the variance between men of what falls within an acceptable range more than overlaps the entirety of the human female population. Men will even have sex with men who have surgically turned themselves into women (and enjoy it enough to claim to do so publicly), and in many cases men who haven't yet had the surgery. The notion that men have unrealistic beauty standards is made into a joke with these facts.

Because male sexuality is so constant, and so, frankly, unstoppable, it is taken for granted by the general population. We expect that men will continue trying to have sex regardless of what obstacles are put before them. We expect this because we've never seen men behave in any other fashion, it's like the foundation of the house with the water main underneath it. We've never seen a single hint that anything is amiss. Water still shows up at the tap, the pressure is seemingly constant, likewise men still seemingly have sex with most any women, (and enjoy it) so what's wrong? Indeed, the homeowner never hears what the water main can't tell them, and since most days the water main never has a problem worth reporting anyway, what's the real problem with that? No one pays any attention to the men who can't get sex, in fact biology demands that such men are ignored as women are the ones who choose men. Men are the plentiful ingredient in procreation, the ultimate object in society that is tested, poked, prodded, smelled, rolled, tapped, and beaten before a decision is made to cook with it. Women are the ones who decide which ingredients, which men, get to procreate.

So what should happen then, when we increase the water flow into the house, and increase the line pressure to the house in order to get better showers years after the house was built? What happens when we both ignore the persistent neglect of the plumbing, and increase our demands on that plumbing? Generally you get a major domestic flooding event when you do things like this, that can require a complete rebuild of the house to fix it. Metaphors aside, we have neglected to maintain masculinity in our culture. We have ignored the maintenance of healthy masculine role models for boys and men. We have removed these role models and replaced them with the idea that simply adopting the opposite properties/behaviors that we generally need in men is good for them. We did this because some people got their head wrapped around the idea that masculinity itself was causing social problems. This is worse than not performing maintenance, this is akin to dumping acid and sand into your water supply.

Masculine role models and indeed male sexuality itself are now directly suppressed by culture in the U.S. and the west in general (and some of the East). Imagine for a moment you're a man who for many reasons, some of them biological (autism spectrum), has no confidence approaching and talking to women in a such a way to communicate desire but not embarass yourself and others. You've never had success talking to women, everything you've tried has been a humiliating disaster. You've seen other men who don't look much different than you seemingly pick up women with barely a thought. Your friends/tribe have moved away before you broke down this barrier in yourself. Your only choice at that point is to pretend you're just like the rest of the guys, as being ostracized from your new tribe is probably worse than not getting laid. More importantly, in order to be attractive to women you need a good career, so a significant amount of your personal attention is spent simply building up a career and assets. So you suppress this truth about yourself, the men around you don't know and think you're normal, many of the women who encounter you also have no idea and think you're normal and have a "normal" sex life (whatever that means)... As a man you're in a position where people do not automatically come up to you and propose sex, you're in a position where you must propose to someone or get nothing. On top of this you are bombarded daily by the routine cultural images about the power of female sexuality, advertisements geared toward subverting your male attention away from what you want to an image of a sexy woman, movies and music video where a woman is only in them to entice you to see her naked, a social scene predicated on getting women into the doors of establishments wearing as little as possible in order to extort money from men who want to be around them. As a man in this position you are not in a position where the opposite sex is easy to deal with. You are not in a position of power, you're in a position where the opposite sex has all of the social advantages and is extremely selective in who they will give attention to. And you have undoubtedly been made aware of all the legal and social trouble you can get into if you make a mistake trying to approach a woman with the intent of communicating physical desire. Imagine being a man like this, virginal, socially awkward, no experience with women, no masculine role models, no men in your life that want to educate you on what to do to be successful, spending 50-60 hours a week just keeping your career moving forward so you don't look like a loser to women... Imagine being all this in the era of #metoo. You've never had success with women, and you see stories of men with tremendous power being destroyed because they did something 40 years ago as awkward as you have perhaps thought of doing or have done in your past.

What sane man would set foot outside his house with the intent of finding a woman with all of that against him? The only answer to that is men who have had success gaining intimacy with women in their youth. Most men, thankfully, do end up with enough positive sexual experiences with women at a young enough age that this never becomes a chronic and growing problem. But what if you've never had success with women? What if you make it to 20-25 years old and everything you try just ends up wrong and most of your memories of trying are just painful humiliation? What then? Frankly, men who reach this state are time bombs. They have a biochemistry that demands (not requests, DEMANDS) intimacy with women, a culture that tells them their social instincts in this vein are wrong or evil, parents or single-mothers who didn't like or appreciate masculinity properly, and nothing but memories of rejection. It is a miracle that most (thankfully) don't blow up their lives in a hail of bullets and innocent lives lost. The men who are experiencing or will experience the worst of what I described are just now hitting puberty, and the men currently shooting up schools and businesses had it far easier. Now the women of society want to shame men for using porn, buying sex dolls, and using prostitutes. It seems the gynocentric western culture just will not stop until the only men who exist are alpha males.

We have both denigrated and removed healthy masculinity in society, and increased our social demands upon men at the same time. This is the same recipe for disaster that a homeowner creates when he changes his pressure to his house after neglecting to maintain the plumbing. The result is involuntary or voluntary celibacy and the resulting socially-generated mental illness in men on a large scale. Involuntary celibacy is often a mental trap, a pit from which there is no escape without significant therapy. No one is going to try to teach you and make you feel comfortable learning how to socially approach women in a way that demonstrates you want sex from them once you get past the age of 20-25 as a man. Most people in your life are going to expect that you've learned that by then. You can't go out and experiment with approaching women because culture teaches you that if you screw up, you'll lose your job in the best case scenario, go to jail in the worst. And the older you get, the more humiliating it is to even hint that you're a man who can't get women. If you're an incel, your celibacy and worse the reasons for it, is a secret which you are forced to keep from your adult friends or frankly end up looking like a damaged individual. There is no social acceptance of male virgins, women don't value them, and men don't respect them.

Some men are lucky, some men understand intersexual social dynamics right out of the gate. Some women are lucky and are born a little bigger and stronger than other women. We don't as a society fail to help some 5'1" 80lb woman because she is physically incapable of doing something physical with her small stature. It's not her fault, she was born that way. We DO, AS A SOCIETY, fail to help men who need special help getting to a socially-aware and socially-healthy place in society where they can be effective and clear in communicating their own sexual desires in a way that is useful and not disruptive to everyone else. We neglect the needs of men in this way even with direct scientific evidence of the autism spectrum and how it primarily affects men. In fact we treat these men as invalids that aren't worth our time. We didn't use to do this, we used to help men with these issues. We helped them by allowing male-only spaces to exist where men can help other men learn how to better themselves and take social confidence from small successes. Women have invaded and destroyed all of these spaces under the guise of "equality" of the sexes. This problem would be solvable if men-only clubs still existed and were protected from female influence.

Incels might be a small problem now but they're going to be a huge problem in the future if the culture wont stop denigrating male sexuality. We've already seen the signs of stress, an increase in mass shootings by men who clearly wanted to commit suicide, but not before making themselves famous by killing as many innocent people as possible. This is a classic case of feeling ignored your entire life and letting that build up until you will literally murder innocent people to not be ignored. How many of these men who became criminals just to be noticed by society were involuntarily celibate? How many of these men would have not done this if health male-only spaces where men can deal with male problems existed? How much water pressure must we lose on our home plumbing system before we try to investigate where we went wrong? We will never know the answers to those questions as long as we ignore the signs. It's time to start listening to what men don't say. It's time for the female perspective on life to remain silent for a while. Just a while, not forever, and not completely silent. The world has heard the whingings of women of the developed world loud and clear, so loudly, clearly, and persistently that those who are being ignored will kill just to not be ignored.

#incel #involuntarilycelibate #gynocentrism #shootings #masculinity #mentalhealth