Supergirl S01E04 Review (Parody)

 

imdb:

“Kara must babysit Cat’s son, while James is visited by Lucy Lane.”

This sounds soo awesome! I can’t wait for the next episode of the Maiden of Steel:

“Kara needs to repair her laundry machine while Alex watches Dancing with the Stars.”

Oh wait, there was something with bombings too.

 

Stupor-Girl is patrolling the city in the middle of the day and leaves a jet trail behind. I guess she should avoid eating chilli con carne and drinking too much kerosine. It could create a “backdraft”. Three laser dots mark her left arm, indicating that she is targeted by a Predator. Must suck to be on the list of endangered species. But it turns out it is just a very expensive toy drone which she immediately shoots down with her Plasma-Vision™. Stupor-Girl is a dick to toys.

 

Area 51:

Kara: “I return this to you. I thought we were…klicking.” (actual dialogue)

Hank Henshaw: “You kids and your silly slang. Do I need an Urban Dictionary now? Learning Klingon was hard enough already.”

Alex: “This is not one of ours cause it has no markings.”

Kara: “Actually that makes me way more suspicious since the DEO is a secret operation…that hides!”

Hank Henshaw:” Alien origins?”

Alex: “It has rotors like any other rotor drone here on earth. What makes you think it’s alien?”

Hank Henshaw: “You’re the Alien Biologist. Tell me.”

Alex: “My Alien Skills say no.”

Hank Henshaw: “I don’t like someone spying on my assets.”

See? Stupor-Girl is an asset, so she can have friends despite DEO rules.

Alex: “You can trust him.” (actual dialogue)

Yeah, this is normally the point where things start to get ugly.

 

CATCO – Constantly Absent Tenure Circling of Obliviousness:

Winn represents Kara and is fighting with Cat’s lifestyle schedule when Kara super-speeds in. So, she is as fast as the Flash or no one notices that?

Kara: “Wow! Miss Grunt won the Seagull Prize for Women in the Media!”

Winn: “She won a price for being a woman? This show suddenly takes a dangerous turn into female machismo.”

Who wrote the script for this episode? Anita Sarkeesian?

Kara books a plane to Metropolis for Cat Grant without consulting her first when her super-listening powers suddenly kick in for no reason and she eavesdrop on her She-Boss. She overhears a conversation without showing any form of courtesy. Stupor-Girl is a dick to other peoples privacy.

Cat Grant: “It is just a prize mother.”

Kara just got the call for the nomination. Does Cat Grant’s mother work with the Seagull committee? I bet she has psychic powers – yeah, way more reasonable.

Cat Grant: “Kara! Get me a salad for lunch. Doesn’t matter which one as long as it has a cheeseburger on top.” (actual dialogue)

I bet we never see her eating that cheeseburger.

Kara: “Congratulations! This award is huuuge!”

Cat Grant: “Unless they mail it to me, I wont be attending to the ceremony.”

Kara: “But it’s the first time you beat Lois Lane!”

Are there only two women in the media? No wonder they need a prize for that achievement.

Cat Grant: “I would love to rub it in her annoying, freckled button-nose but I have no babysitter for my son.”

Annoying, freckled button-nose? So, this show is in the same universe as Man of Steel’s Amy-Adams-Lois-Lane. Than there is a Batman and Wonder Woman too.

Together with Stupor-Girl that makes four women in the media which suddenly turn the Seagull award overrated.

Kara: “You have no one to babysit? I can do that since I missed to do that for my cousin.”

Cat Grant: “Why would you do that for me?”

Maybe because she is your personal assistant? That’s what they do – clean the dishes, wash the car, get clothes from the laundry, booking planes and order food.

Cat Grant: “I see, you think I owe you then. I never seen this quality in you…I love it!” (actual dialogue)

Kara: “This prize is important to you, so it is for me.” (actual dialogue)

I feel a stroke incoming soon.

Cat Grant: “My son…Carter is unlike normal boys. He is clever and curious and like other gifted children he can be…shy. He needs special attention.”

Every mother who doesn’t know her son says that. I bet he is a 17-year old perv.

 

 

Kara: “Don’t worry Miss Grant, I have tons of babysitting certifications and a master in child care.”

That’s not what she said, but what she needs to be legally allowed to take care of “gifted” children who needs “special” treatment.

 

The only cafeteria in National City (this is so unlike the Flash show):

James and Lucy having drama while a shitty cover version of Cindy Lauper’s “Time after Time” plays in the background. Seriously, who is that asshole that picks the music for this show?

James: “Blablabla and bla.”

Lucy: “Dramarama-o-rama.”

This is more or less the actual dialogue filtered by my liquored brain. Kara appears for Cat Grant’s Cheeseburger Salad.

James: “She is obsessed with her career and dumped me.”

Kara: “I would never dump you – instead I would hump you.”

James: “What?”

Kara: “Oh, was I speaking out loud?”

Fortunately for Kara a bomb went off a few blocks away which creates an earthquake only in the cafeteria. Fire that architect.

Stupor-Girl flies to the bombed skyscraper that is about to collapse despite the fact that only a corner office seems to have been damaged. Fire that architect.

She tries to support the building with her strength – easy as pie. But the script says that the pillars need to collapse so she uses her trusted Plasma-Vision™ to heat up the rebar steel of the concrete pillars which – against all odds – works surprisingly well. So much for the jet fuel theory Mr. Bush.

Standing ovations for the Maiden of Steel from the cheering crowd which decided to stay and watch in hope the building doesn’t collapse nonetheless. Self-preservation isn’t well developed in National City. They should visit New York sometimes. Stupor-Girl uses her Mentos-Breath™ to extinguish the fire while another Predator Drone observes her activities.

This time she doesn’t notices it because it has the same design.

 

Back to Area 51:

Hank Henshaw: “You were supporting the weight of a 120 pounds of square foot multiplied by five floors.” (actual dialogue)

I don’t even know where to start what’s wrong with his explanation…let’s say it’s utter bollocks.

Kara: “Who would bomb a building?”

Hank Henshaw: “Maybe it was industrial espionage since there was a tech-lab in that office.”

Uhm, you don’t usually blow up a lab to get a hold on some prototype tech – explosions and tech don’t work well together.

Alex: “My alien expert skills may have a solution. Despite being not involved into non-alien investigation, we nonetheless have some bomb parts here and my alien biology expertise was able to identify the tech behind it – it is the same as in that drone you shot down.”

Kara: “Soooo…building a drone and building a bomb require the exact same technology?”

Alex: “I know that sounds retarded but I may have a lead. The tech was made by Lord Industries.”

Hank Henshaw: “Let’s pay Maxwell Smart…err..Lord a visit.”

Kara: “Okie-dokie do that, even so it’s none of your business since there are no aliens involved but I have to go back to work.”

Alex: “Uuh..back to James right? Sweaty time?”

Kara: “Sadly not. He is hanging out with his Ex-GF.”

Alex: “Who would drop Supergirl?”

Kara: “Lucy Lane – she is smart, pretty and smells good. Hell, even I would make out with her.” (actual dialogue)

Your first theory was partly right Winn and for the “smart” part – Lucy dropped James. Once you go black…

Alex: “Nono, don’t bring in the ex to your conversations! That gives you a ticket straight to the friendzone.”

Kara: “I never was in the friendzone.”

Yes you are Stupor-Girl but that’s no shame. Friends can have sex too y’know.

Alex: “You’ve been longer in the friendzone than in the Phantom Zone.” (actual dialogue)

Nice Alex, but Kara was 24 years in the Phantom Zone and is only 11 years on Earth by now…do the math alien expert.

Cat Grant calls via bluetooth and asks how the babysitting goes.

Kara: “Shit, I forgot to babysit Cat’s son!”

Slow clap….well done Stupor-Girl or should I call you from now on Sub-Par-Girl?

Stupor-Girl is a dick to children.

 

 

Stupor-Girl flies with super-speed to her babysitting duty while trying to re-create the scene from Iron Man after Tony’s first time as Iron man – but it fails miserably.

Cat Grant: “What’s that noise?”

Kara: “It’s…it’s super-windy here.”

Cat Grant: “You aren’t there yet?”

She flies to his private school and changes her clothes in a bush. Wait, where does she keeps her regular clothes? Then she runs towards the school and “receives” the boy after signing papers without checking her credentials. Yes, it sounds weird but that is what happens. Immature boys are treated like delivery packages in this show. It turns out Cat’s son is indeed a teenager with the look of a future super-villain – Nerd-Boy!

Kara: “Hey Carter. Remember me?”

Carter: “Why would I remember you? We just first met…I mean…nerdy-nerd-geek-nerdiness.”

Kara: “This will be fun. Your mother travels from the west to the east coast, have her ceremony and then travels back. Could be only a couple of hours aye?”

 

Lord Industries:

Maxwell Lord: “Yes, that’s my tech. May I ask where you found it?”

Hank Henshaw: “Inside a bomb that destroyed an office yesterday.”

Maxwell Lord: “I’m no suspect since that office was inofficial part of my company…y’know, secret stuff. Still suspicious?”

Alex: “Any idea who’s targeting you?”

Maxwell Lord: “I’m an american business man in a superhero show agents.”

Hank Henshaw: “I see…it could be anyone.”

Alex: “Let’s narrate that down to people with access to the tech, the lab and who have a personal grudge.”

Maxwell Lord: “I see who is the smart one here.” (actual dialogue)

Seriously? An office was bombed and this is personal? A bomb under his car would be personal. A horse head in his bed would be personal. But the destruction of an office which has no official relation with Lord Industries? This sounds pretty far-fetched.

 

CatComa Media Empire:

Kara sat Carter on a chair next to her desk while doing work. Is she the Super-Nanny now? Winn couldn’t represent her again? I forgot – special treatment. The news show some Supergirl footage which made Carter drooling with pervy nerdiness. I knew it!

 

 

Kara: “You have a crush on Supergirl!”

Winn: “A Supergirl fanboy! How adorkable. You know I know her.”

Carter: “No you don’t.”

Kara: “No you don’t.”

Winn is such an attention whore. Kara notices James in Cat’s empty office by what looks like destroying her equipment. I bet Ms. Grant has set up webcams in her office and that will backfire later – it’s a media empire after all.

Kara: “Why do you have to use Miss Grants personal stapler? Wanna get fired?”

James: “Digitals…Bombing story…how’s Ms Grant doing?”

His lines doesn’t make any sense to me.

Kara: “She is Miss Grant.”

James: “And she has you.”

Kara: “And you.”

Awkward silence disrupted by a call from Lucy Lane of course. We can’t skip a single cliché can’t we? How this show scored 97% on rotten tomatoes is way beyond my ability to comprehend. Sometimes it feels like I’m the one from Krypton.

James continues to brag about his ex-gf not noticing that it makes feel Kara pretty uncomfy. Welcome to the friendzone.

 

Lord Industries:

The DEO decided to leave Alex as personal bodyguard for Maxwell Smart..err Lor..ah, fuckit – he is Maxwell Smart from now on. I think she is there for two reasons – to use her alien expert skills to identify earthly tech and to have some hanky-panky with handsome Max. It’s astonishing how the writers always find a way to add more drama instead of cleverness. I bet they went to Drama School rather then the Writers School.

Maxwell: “You like trains agent Danvers?”

Alex used her real name for her FBI alias – that’s either very confident or more likely pretty retarded.

Alex: “Physics.” (actual dialogue)

Uhm, and I thought she is an expert in Alien Biology. But what I am complaining here. In these universes (Flash/Arrow/Supergirl) you just need one science skill to cover the rest. I wasted eight years in the university and can’t even remember my passwords.

Alex: “You use electromagnetic propulsion.”

Yes Alex, not only is it written on the blueprints, it is common knowledge of how Maglev’s work. Discovery Channel ladies and gentlemen. Maxwell Smart has his office directly near the lab and uses a pretty mediocre notebook. I hope those high-powered electromagnetics of the prototypes don’t screw up his hard-drives.

Maxwell: “Frictionless drive can reach up to 500 km/h.”

Alex: “You use liquid Helium to cool the Maglev’s?”

Maxwell: “Superconductivity yes…tell me agent Danvers, why do you use your smarts for the government?”

Alex: “Why do you mistrust the government?”

You work for the black ops secret operations department Alex. You should know best.

Maxwell: “They force me to pay taxes.”

Alex: “I work for the DE…err FBI because there is no higher cause than helping others.”

So far you only helped your adopted sister. The government is helping others? I want to live in that universe.

Maxwell: “I feel the same way, but I don’t need a gun to do that.”

That was a pretty smart response for a sleazy guy. I bet he is a Billy Idol fan.

Maxwell: “The world needs a new kind of hero.”

That’s one way to change the subject for this conversation.

Alex: “I thought we just got one.”

Maxwell: “Supergirl is just a glorified fireman.” (actual dialogue)

Those firemen from the harbour fire/oil spill would disagree with you here Max. The dialogue gets interrupted by a bomb in a box in the middle of the lab. Fortunately the bomb didn’t went off when they opened the container. A neat countdown timer displays approaching doom.

 

 

Alex: “Evacuate the building.”

Maxwell: “Do that. I disarm the bomb.”

Alex: “What? Are you a bomb expert? I thought you dislike weapons?”

Maxwell: “It’s an irony trying to kill me with my own tech – but it is still my tech!”

He screws around with the frame and cuts a wire but the bomb refuses to be disarmed and speeds up the countdown. Sadly, this doesn’t speed up this episode.  A commercial break interrupts the nail-biting tension and when it’s over we see the smoking carcass of the Lord Industries building…just kiddin’ – more drama at CATCO folks!

 

CATCO Child Care:

Carter: “That guy knows Superman right? You think he can ask him to introduce me to Supergirl?”

Kara: “His name is James and you definitively are your mothers son.”

Is that an insult?

Alex: “Kara! Bomb! One minute!”

Kara: “Bye child I have to take care of. That man-child over there takes care of you.”

Winn: “I’m only in this show to cover Kara’s ass am I?

Stupor-Girl is a dick to her friends.

 

Lord Industries – short before boom:

Stupor-Girl enters…somehow (teleportation?) and Maxwell gives her the bomb.

Maxwell: “The demon core collapses inside a flux compensator which creates a quantum anomaly…”

Stupor-Girl: “What?”

Alex: “Bomb goes boom soon – bring it far away from the city.”

Stupor-Girl leaves the same way..no security doors? No wonder the bomb made its way into the lab unnoticed. This is so unlike the Flash show.

She flies with the bomb in 250 ft. height instead leaving the atmosphere which is only 70 km above the city but to keep up the tension she carries the bomb through the whole town.

Hank Henshaw: “You’re not making it far enough. Change course.”

Stupor-Girl: “Which way?”

Hank Henshaw: “Up.”

He is smarter than Alex. Stupor-Girl flies up even though she is already above the ocean but to keep Aquaman save she holds on to the bomb until it asplodes.

 

 

Area 51 – Solar Recharge Station for wounded Kryptonians:

Stupor-Girl slowly awakes and notices Hank Henshaw with red-glowing eyes. But it was probably only a bad dream. Or wasn’t it?

Hank Henshaw: “DEO rescue team pulled you out from the ocean.”

How did they find her? I see, he doesn’t like it when someone is spying on his assets because he want to do that all by himself.

Hank Henshaw: “If we knew that such a small bomb could take you out that easy then we wouldn’t had to spend millions of tax-dollars on kryptonite research earlier. A flight recorder is more sturdy than you are.”

Kara: “Lucky, that explosion didn’t shred my costume and render me naked or even worse mess my make-up. Do I look good?”

Hank Henshaw: “Surveillance footage of the bomb showed us the real suspect. Ethan Knox.”

Yeah sure…show me a picture of some high-heels and I can tell you the celebrity wearing them.

Kara: “How do we find him? He is no alien so your magic-alien-finding-satellites are useless here.”

Alex: “We? A fall from that height could have rattled your cousin. You stay at home.” (actual dialogue)

First of all, what does the fall have to do with do it? Second, it doesn’t matter if you fall 150 ft or 5,000 ft – terminal velocity is the same. Third, you shot her down in the pilot with kryptonite and last but not least since when does such a tiny explosion or impact on water have any consequences for Kryptonians? Superman wouldn’t even blink.

But hey, play the over-protective sister once more and let the DEO handle the non-alien investigation they aren’t officially allowed to handle and Hank Henshaw even made it clear once that he didn’t even bother. What a contrived horseshit.

Kara: “But I have to stop him! And I…ohmygawd! I forgot Ms. Grant’s son – again!”

You’re such a role model Sub-Par Girl.

Alex: “You are straining yourself too much Kara. Being Supergirl, Cat’s assistant and a DEO agent on top of all. Even the Maiden of Steel can break.”

I’m confused – is Kara now a DEO agent or just an asset? I don’t see her Holo-Badge anywhere.

 

CATCO – Arcade Convention:

For some reason it is still the same day and concerning the daylight it is even the same time. Winn and Carter play a gory ego-shooter in Cat Grant’s office using her artsy multi-monitor wall to display every aspect of rated NC-17 blood-splatterness. Can’t wait to see Winn’s face when Carter tells his mom.

Winn: “Double Kill!”

Carter: “Multi Kill!”

Winn: “Ultra Kill!!”

Carter: “M-M-M-MONSTER KILL!!!”

Winn: “LUDICROUS KILL!!!”

Carter: “HOLY SHIT!”

Kara: “Thank you for watching him Winn. I go again to get some lunch.”

Kara needs a personal assistant of her own.

Kara goes to the only cafeteria/cantina/tavern/cocktail bar in National City to order food and guess who shows up there? Lucy Lane is stalking Kara.

Lucy: Kara.”

Kara: “Lucy.”

Lucy: “I left my phone here yesterday.”

So much for being smart. But since she didn’t asked the bartender I doubt she lost it at all.

Oh boy, we are just half-way through this shit? Let’s skip the drama here okay?

 

Lord Industries:

Alex: “You fired that guy 6 month ago. He got divorced and his daughter got sick. So he blames you. You can’t go to a party.”

Maxwell: “I’m not afraid of a terrorist.” (actual dialogue)

Yeah, he wants to kill you Max and not trying to enforce some political agenda y’know? #GetYourFactsStraigt

Alex: “Why are you fighting me? The government is trying to protect you.”

Maxwell: “I don’t trust the government.”

Alex: “Yeah, you said that before but I snooped around in your private life and your parents were working for the government.”

Maxwell: “My parents worked in a Bio-Lab, creating vaccines against bio-weapons. They trusted the government but one day a virus entered their hazmat-suits and they died. But you know that since you read my file right?”

Scientists are responsible for the safety of their labs and equipment, but sure, blame the government for being careless.

 

CATCO – Home of people doing the wrong jobs:

James is supervising reporters for the big Maxwell-Maglev-Train-Exposition-Event instead of being there – as a photographer! It was clearly sunset in the scene earlier at Lord Industries but the sun always shines high noon at CatCo.

Two and a half minutes of superfluous drama later we see footage of Lord’s Super-Rail Launch on James screen which reminds Kara to drop Cat’s son once more and fly to Area 51 to assist.

 

Area 51 – Main Exposition Room (still no aliens here):

Half a dozen agents in civil clothing observing monitors. The DEO is pretty slack with their dress code.

Kara: “So, how can I screw it up this time?”

Hank Henshaw: “You’re sure you can babysit a train?”

Kara: “I was born to do that and since when the train is up and running, even the DEO can’t keep up with it.”

Uhm, the train has a max. speed of 500 km/h and you were flying earlier with Mach 2 and the DEO could keep up with you. Stupor-Girl is a dick to math.

 

CATCO – Home of unnecessary drama:

James & Lucy

Skip

Stupor-Girl flies to the Stark Expo…err Lord’s Super-Rail presentation. She just arrives and Alex asks her if she see the bomber. Alex has more confidence in Kara’s super-senses as I have regarding her former performance.

 

CATCO – Home of mistrusted babysitting:

James is working in Cat’s office, obviously to babysit Carter while Winn comes back with a giant pizza. There is no delivery service in National City. The game is paused – did they played the whole time? But Carter is gone.

Winn: “Hey, where is Carter?”

James: “Sorry – phone call.” (vanishes)

I can’t wait to see what happens when Carter tells his mom how his day was in detail. She will hulk out…but since she sat on her balcony drinking wine while a total blackout happened in the next episode and her son or her care for him wasn’t even mentioned in episode 5, I doubt there will any consequences. Woman of the year my ass.

 

Lord Expo:

Carter is there of course to meet Supergirl. How did he get there? Magic? Worm Hole? Teleportation? Script? Ooh..yeah right. Everyone wants to take a ride on the Maglev prototype cooled by liquid helium. What could go possibly wrong.

 

CATCO – Where stuff happens:

Nameless redhead hottie: “You need to send any available reporter to the airport.”

James: “Why?”

Nameless redhead hottie: “NCPD found a bomb.”

James: “The airport? Why not the Expo?”

Nameless redhead hottie: “Hey, I’m only here to drop exposition not explanation.”

The camera pans around James 1800° while he tries to call Kara. The director thinks he is Michael Bay.

A single female ticket collector is guarding the escalator to the train station. So much for the tight DEO security.

Guard: “You have a ticket kid?”

Carter: “Duh.”

Maxwell: “Lost your parents kid? I lost mine once too. Here, let me guide you into the highly-experimental train of mine with a possible bomber aboard.”

This happened.

Winn appears at the train station and stammers around instead to tell the female guard about Carter. The bomber convinently appears at the open train doors to see for Winn. They look at each other for hours, so Winn can’t miss the bomb under his jacket until he finally zips it up. The bomber never heard about security cameras, or witnesses or K9 or Supergirl.

97% on rotten tomatoes ladies & gentlemen.

Winn calls Kara to inform her about the bomb and Carter but Hank Henshaw wants her at the airport – decisions, decisions.

Kara: “I have to trust my friend…and try to be a good babysitter. You take the airport and I take the train.”

Hank Henshaw: “I hope you don’t since the train is still slower than flying.”

James drives through National City to the airport. He drives like mad through the streets and we see Stupor-Girl crossing his view, flying in the opposite direction.

Kara enters the bullet-train via roof-hatch…and no one gets sucked out for some reason. Carter is wetting his pants in excitement.

Kara: “The bomber is here.”

Maxwell: “That’s impossible!” (actual dialogue)

Yeah, it was absolutely impossible to board the train without a ticket…maybe he bought one? I bet Maxwell let him in – sweet insurance money incoming soon.

Kara: “You have to stop the train.”

Maxwell: “I can’t. It’s automated.”

And? Every automated system has an override in case of emergency. You suck at inventing stuff Max.

Carter: “There is a problem isn’t it?” (actual dialogue)

Thanks for the info kid as if it wasn’t that obvious….

Kara: “I’m here to help. You look brave and strong. Can you help me?” (actual dialogue)

My brain…much pain…must resist drinking bleach….

Stupor-Girl uses her Cancer-Vision™ to scan the train for the bomber instead for a bomb and he conveniently turned around so she can see his face. Does he possess ESP-Powers?

 

National City airport:

James arrives in his silver penis-enlargement car of product placement and is looking for Stupor-Girl. Fuck the panicked people around you right? The DEO arrives too to take care of the bomb. James yells over the noisy crowd.

James: “Where is Supergirl?”

Alex: “She isn’t coming.”

But guess who is there James? Lucy Lane of course…because why not? We better skip the drama once more because not only is it painful to watch, it doesn’t progress the plot any further – it is just filler.

Alex: “The scanner can’t look inside – we are screwed!”

Hank Henshaw: “Leave, I handle it.”

Alex leaves and Hank Henshaw uses his hidden powers of red-glowing eyes to dismantle the bomb with his bare hands – yup, this happened. The DEO evacuated the civilians to a nearby parking lot so they get killed all at once in case something went horribly wrong. But it doesn’t since Hank Henshaw walks out of the airport like a boss with the disarmed bomb in his hands. If that doesn’t raise suspicions then I don’t know what will.

 

Bullet-Train of Doom:

Kara forces her way into the cockpit and the scared suicide-bomber does not immediately triggers the bomb for some reason.

Kara: “I’m here to help. But you have to disarm the bomb first.”

Does this ever work?

Ethan Knox: “Save those people but my bomb will go on. You have 30 seconds.”

Kara uses her Plasma-Vision™ to separate the cockpit from the rest of the speeding train which doesn’t trigger any safety measurements like an emergency brake. Your inventions suck Maxwell Smart. So, Stupor-Girl has to use her strength to slow down the train while the dangerous part is still driving through the town with 500 km/h. But I’m sure an earthly bomb that can take out a Kryptonian can’t harm earthy buildings…oh wait.

 

 

It takes one minute for the bomb to explode while it conveniently crosses shallow water. I bet you can get an aneurysm from watching TV.

 

Area 51 – Forensics Lab:

Alex: Strange, Hank Henshaw told us it was a decoy to distract us from the real bomb on the train but it has a kill-switch.”

Kara: “Yeah, I know. Anything doesn’t make sense here.”

You take the words right out of my mouth…maybe I should call you Supergirl again.

Kara: “Ethan sounded sad and not angry. He said he does it to help his daughter but how does this help her?”

Ask Maxwell Smart Supergirl. And when you do, try to bring in the rotor drones from earlier into the conversation. Y’know, the ones everyone seems to have forgotten about?

Alex: “Who knows? Parents can go nuts when it comes to their kids.”

Kara: “Ooh shit! I forgot about Carter! Again!!”

Yeah, I think Stupor-Girl still fits pretty fine.

 

CATCO Enterprises:

Cat Grant returns and hugs her son. I thought she is a vegan? Stay away from that meat Cat!

Cat Grant: “Honey! I was soo afraid…well not afraid enough to arrive sooner but still concerned.”

Carter: “I met Supergirl. She is soo pretty and strong…”

Cat Grant: “Yes, and smart and brave and kind and she saved you.”

I’m not so sure about the smart and kind traits since she is a dick to Carter.

Kara arrives in the nick of time say goodbye to him at least but here it comes. Carter covers her dickish, constant absence for no fuckin’ reason. Tell your mom about that cool ego-shooter match with Winn – I bet she will promote him and fire Kara as she deserves it.

Carter: “Can she watch me again?” (actual dialogue)

Cat Grant: “Okay, back to school. Leave to be never mentioned again in this show. Especially not in the next one where it would count.”

Kara: “I’m soo sorry Miss Grant…I worked and when I looked up he was gone!”

Cat Grant: “I never should have let you handle it in the first place.”

Yes, because it is your job real mother of singleness.

Kara: “I don’t know how you juggle it.”

Cat Grant: “Oh Kira! You have stumbled across the most annoying question of the century.” (actual dialogue)

Cat likes to give Kara nicknames too – that makes her sympathetic…odd.

Cat Grant: “How do you juggle it all? You learn. First two balls, then three and so on.”

Kira. “Thanks Master Yoda. I will keep that in mind.”

Cat Grant: “I figured out to be brilliant in business and then I figured out to become a brilliant mother.”

You just lost the tiny bit of credit I was willing to give you Cat.

Cat Grant: “And use conditioner for your hair for christ’s sake.”

Yep, any kind of credit totally gone now.

James and Lucy having smoochie time in the office because where else? And guess who is noticing it and feels uncomfy?

 

Lord Industries:

Stupor-Girl tries to intimidate Maxwell Smart like Superman did with Lex Luthor – by flying in front of his office and looking grim. But he is a sleazy scumback like every businessman in comic book history including Tony Stark and smirks like a douche.

Kira: “I checked the hospital bills for Ethan Knox’s daughter. You paid for it which is pretty suspicious.”

Maxwell: “Because I care for the health of a child doesn’t proof I’m behind all this y’know…but to not insult the low intelligence of the target audience I will explain vaguely my train of thought (pun intended) to you like a generic Bond-Villain.”

Kira: “You were testing me.”

Maxwell: “Everyone asks what are you made of. What are your limits? Resistances? And most of all – is that your true hair color? It looks cheaply dyed. I mean seriously, it looks ridiculous!”

Kira: “I maybe can’t proof you are behind of it but I’m sure will be watching you.”

Next time use that military bluetooth of yours to record such conversations Stupor-Girl. Detective work 101.