I've been reviewing movies in different capacities for about five years. In that time I've come across some very strange ducks with some very strange ideas about what it is I do and who I am. I had an interesting tΓͺte-Γ -tΓͺte with an actor who did not appreciate my assessment of both his acting abilities and his movie. And I had a freaking blast doing it.
Now I mostly make videos, because my fingers are just about frozen because of fibromyalgia. But I am determined to keep going just as long as I have breath in me and horror movies suck. That's about forever. In 2015, I decided to add reading short horror stories to my YouTube page. That usually happens at times when I can't even get myself in front of the camera.
I looked around on the Internet for several months before starting, and realize that a lot of people were into what is called creepy pasta, commonly called that because they're literally cut and paste stories that have unknown beginnings. I don't like them. I probably would have liked them, but when you heard the same stories told by different people, you get pretty sick of them pretty quickly. Besides, I have a whole ton of books and a whole lot of short stories on hand. Now I've been doing that part since about 2015.
Now in 2015 I read a story by Clive Barker out of his Books of Blood anthology, and got some good and some not so good reviews for the reading. Most of the not so good reviews were because of issues with my voice, my equipment, or just the music I would use in the background. In other words, it was common growing pains when you try something new and I had never done this before.
So as I have continued, I've adjusted, try different things, and for the most part I enjoy reading those stories. They take an awful lot of editing though. That means an awful lot of time I need to be awake when I am at a point where being awake is almost a luxury. So when I get interesting feedback, I take the time to really really look at it and I never ever let anything go by without at least a small comment, or a novel depending on what that person is talking about and if they even know what they're talking about.
In November 2015 this story was published on my YouTube. The Book of Blood. It would soon prove to be a very interesting and still ongoing fight not with the devil, but with a very, very, self-important Wiccan. Let me explain .
In about the third week of February, I received a comment from somebody and I'll go ahead and use their name here and if they don't like it they shouldn't have written to me - E. K. Colleni. This person was obviously not happy with my reading. I have no problem with what people tell me, in fact the more colorful or interesting their comments, the more I enjoy them. And I never back out of a fight. Especially when I know that the person fighting just doesn't quite have the necessary gray matter to keep up with me.
So we were off. I was going to just put screen captures here but I don't know how. I'll leave a link to the original post at the end. Keep in mind, this woman is very very angry with my disgusting way of reading. And I am very very much laughing my ass off that she would go to such lengths to tell me so about a story I read almost 2 years ago.
C: Background music is REALLY annoying!! :( .. plus you have the mic too near your mouth so we can hear your saliva against your tongue.. not nice! :(
Me: I will be sure to check it out with your doctor, obviously the therapy isn't working. You may need a higher dose or perhaps a different medication altogether. In the meantime, try to get some rest while you're in lockdown, and I promise to keep in touch with my crack team of... crackers to get that way-back machine up and running, but they're complaining that it's slow going. That's to be expected working with invisible parts, I guess.
Then, three days ago:
C: Nothing wrong with me you arrogant bitch!. you obviously have a problem with criticism.. I suggest YOU go get your gums sorted with your dentist.. saliva swishing about indicates you are not using the correct adhesive for your dentures! :(
Oh yes, it was ON. I took a couple of minutes of research, then:
Me: Did your Tarot cards glean this information for you? I may be silly, sometimes even sarcastic. But I am, as always, a lady. One with good strong teeth and no dental complaints. One with good intentions and one who tries to read well, not just to please all people because, as you've attested to, that is quite impossible. You would think an Empath would be aware of that but alas, those of us with the true skills will evade your hatred every time.
Oh, and about my supposed dental problems? I put that gum smacking together inside your head. Good luck getting any rest now. Peace and harmony my dear - and Karma.πππ»ππΌππ½ππΎππΏ Oh, one more thing. Special blessings spiced with love, seasoned with salt, and served with respect to the older ones of your family.
She was freaked out, but not enough to know when to shut up:
C: How DID you know I am a Tarot reader and a Wiccan with TRUE Romany background ?? SO clever of you!. I read cards professionally for the good of my customers with nary a complaint... you should know also that a Tarot reader.. a GOOD one will NEVER read their own cards!. However MY teeth and gums are surely in better condition and I cannot say I have heard the aforesaid smacking (snacking?) in MY head at all.. only the voices of MUCH better Horror readers than you on audio.. you should give them a try. The narration for Alien is FAR superior and MUCH more enjoyable to listen to in my spare time. Cheerio ducks.. off to pastures new .. :) .. btw .. I hear the new Seabond Adhesive is pretty fail safe. NOT that I use it.. ;) .. Namaste
Pffft... Namaste? This chick is all over the map and has never heard of comedy much less good humor. But at least I freaked her out a little. So I'm trying again:
Me: Dear little one, if you were of TRUE Romany blood you would have recognized that my God is the most powerful and the most loving. He is certainly smarter than the puny pagan gods you worship that you believe picks your cards. My Almighty also does not interfere in the pitiful acrimonies of those who, for whatever reason, will pick one of his own to unreasonably expect perfect, professional readings. Especially one he favors and cares for though her ailments are many. He recognizes her love of reading is for just that - the love of reading. He will allow me to continue until the end. You were not being warned before ducky, my blood and my God would not allow harm to come to you in His name. Keep your faith, your cards, your teeth and your listening pleasures close to your heart my dear for it may not be everlasting.
She apparently decided my "discovery" of her work and hobbies (never post personal information on the internet folks) was going to be to her advantage:
C: My dear.. you are not the only one on this Earth with physical aliments.. we ALL have those which make us stronger..I choose to believe in what I see around me not some fake element in the mind.. IF there was a true God there would BE no suffering on this planet.. I suspect you have never recorded yourself and heard the slooshings of your mouth that makes a travesty of everything you read. I also suspect you have no idea of how old I am and Little One is a term I find demeaning to someone that has seen and lived through as much as I. Next time you decide to narrate have a care as to how you are sounding to us.. Clive Barker would have a fit I am sure!. Think on.. Romany blood is far older than yours I kid you not and has nothing to do with faith.. YOUR God!. how very possessive of you!.and FYI ,.. the Christians stole many Pagan rites and are nothing but liars and thieves... ;).. Hark.. I hear slooshing.. :) ,, must dash......
and then...
C: All my Family are dead.. your Fibro must make you really bitter.. I AM the older one of my Family!.. :) Thank you for the salt.. I ran out...
Okay, that was... weird. Now it wasn't gum smacking, I was SLOOSHING. I guess one should never read aloud while drowning. Or something. So I decided to go ALL IN. In Poker is that when you Call? I dunno but I let her have it:
Me: Little one, your continued patter has only weakened whatever powers you claim to have. Search within yourself. You know this to be true. You think I care what your personal preferences for audio narration is?
And you know the truly sad part? This story was one of my first recorded, if you bothered to check, in 2015. So please, gather up your cards (which I have tainted as a reminder not to mess with those truly in power), your crystals, and your Romany blood. My blood goes back to the beginning of mankind. Unfortunately, so does yours. Your arrogance also shows in telling me I am Christian. I made no reference to that at all. I didn't put that gum smacking sound in your head? After all this you still are hearing it.
You are a small, weak Wiccan who has broken several principles of the Wiccan creed. You should be ashamed. Whatever the case, showing disrespect to one as attuned as I and ignoring warning signs from your pitiful pagan gods belies your insecurities and lack of faith. You believe you carry this torch against saliva because you are a strong force on this earth. You are weak. You show no discipline. You have broken the very sacraments you were supposed to hold dear.
My blood, my God (Possessive? Do you therefore deny all of yours although to do so is death?) stays true, warm, and will carry me forward - healthy or not. You are a failure as a Wiccan, your Tarot is tainted, your admitted lack of faith in your pagan gods has sealed your fate. The heavenly bodies and the earthly energies tell that your time is short.
Me: As you give, you receive threefold.
Did anyone notice my Star Wars reference? No? Ah well, since the last of our... conversations took place March 2, I fully expect it to go on until her computer blows up, or she realizes she's messed with the wrong... whatever she thinks I am.
I am smacking my gums in anticipation.
Update March 3, 2017: I saw another notification from her today. I think I'll let her stew a bit before responding. She attacks my hair color (Wow. That's... deep.) which means she probably watched a few more videos. This should be interesting - later. But then I thought of a brilliant angle to try and went to the site. Ha! The woman struck then deleted the whole converation - she thought.
E. K Colleni 9 hours ago
Take your Green, Blue, Yellow UNnatural hair and your fat face and go fuck yourself.. You know nothing about me, my works, my life.. whoever said I was a GOOD Wiccan? ;) .. the rule of 3 and the Crede work both ways.. not just for the Good.. I have had no warnings throughout my 76 years on this plane .. and you call me weak?. lol.. I think not.
Me: Well MS. COLLENI, when someone hits and then runs, that's called a coward. And you would be considered an evil Wiccan by your own definition - which does not exist in the true Wiccan creed. So yeah, you're pretty weak and an old useless woman with no faith in anything. And a definite win for me.
Me: Ladies and Gents, meet the old, cowardly so-called Wiccan in UK somewhere, cowering in her corner and waving her crystals for comfort.
I reprinted the whole thing on the original book video, link is below. She goes down in Miss Murder's history as the funniest witch I ever had the displeasure of jousting with.
And you know what? I listened to the reading. The bitch's smacking and slooshing was definitely in her own head. I hope it never stops...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vLNHa4sNp4&index=63&list=PL-tLkyLON4HcU9jHkrG47N-961KEsdn_c
