...
...
...
...
...
____________________
Why?
I thought this was all strait-forward
Instead, why is it such a invisible labyrint of torment?
____________________
I thought I knew my every walk and every way.
I thought I knew my every word and every say.
But now I found I don't know myself.
I thought I knew you.
I thought I knew me.
But now I don't know anything.
My every thought was about myself.
Perhaps that's still how it is today.
All these thoughts, they bore me.
Wish I listened to yours,
Let them adorn me.
But now its too late,
It's all the same,
Only now you're not here to save me.
_____
But I'll regain my composure.
The fact something was is good enough for me.
I'll entertain myself with these memories.
Surely they are immortal.
I have everything, no?
Though I can't deny pain erupts in me.
These happy memories only bring missery.
Phantasms are not good enough.
If imaginations could cure my pain,
The world would have no suffering,
But that doesn't work.
Still I can't forget you.
I can't help but remember you.
I would rather suffer with what I have left of you,
Then live empty without you.
I can never abandon you.
With these thoughts I still gain nothing.
I think only of myself again.
I only despise myself.
Until we meet again,
I'll comfort myself with your rest.
Until we see each other more than our phantasms,
I'll comfort myself with your memory.