“Oooh, a specialist the Patron calls me, I am honored! True, I am able to deliver deadly and very special battlefield jokes and when needed, of course, shoot baddies in their bums. Or faces… urm, you know, whatever comes first."

#starshatter #quotes #books #scifi #hamster

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“But I already know what true pain is, baddie. I will disrespectfully decline the very generous and I assume, free lesson that you offered. As for the scary stuff? No, my people are not in the assumptions business, baddie. We deal in absolutes, like the cold numbers I gots for ya and ‘yer kid beating friends up there. See, we have three of us against hundreds of ‘yous and so far you’ve done diddly squat, baddie. Sure, you gots us here and thee – my bum hurts, me left cheek to be exact, but that is it. I count a hundred sixty eight of yours, happily rotting with us and none of mine. That means that so far we have you squared, baddie. Whatever is that other, oh-so-glorious supernatural baddie that you pray to, he ain’t helping ya… much. Will admit you gots me butt and it hurts buuuut, dats it!”

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“Awww, come on now, Ears! I knows you deadeye-shooting, watermelon-farming, carrot whiskey-drinking hoppitty hoppers, or whatever it is that your beautiful people water your mouth with these days, can scream proper.”

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409 views

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409 views · Jun 9th

“But I already know what true pain is, baddie. I will disrespectfully decline the very generous and I assume, free lesson that you offered. As for the scary stuff? No, my people are not in the assumptions business, baddie. We deal in absolutes, like the cold numbers I gots for ya and ‘yer kid beating friends up there. See, we have three of us against hundreds of ‘yous and so far you’ve done diddly squat, baddie. Sure, you gots us here and thee – my bum hurts, me left cheek to be exact, but that is it. I count a hundred sixty eight of yours, happily rotting with us and none of mine. That means that so far we have you squared, baddie. Whatever is that other, oh-so-glorious supernatural baddie that you pray to, he ain’t helping ya… much. Will admit you gots me butt and it hurts buuuut, dats it!”

131 views · Jun 9th

“Awww, come on now, Ears! I knows you deadeye-shooting, watermelon-farming, carrot whiskey-drinking hoppitty hoppers, or whatever it is that your beautiful people water your mouth with these days, can scream proper.”

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