I miss being able to stay up for long periods of time and just do whatever I wanted. Now If I don't go to sleep at a reasonable time I'm useless the next day.

You're stronger than you realize. Don't give up and keep trying your best because in the end it will pay off by either succeeding or teaching you valuable lessons for the future. https://teespring.com/you-re-stronger-than-you-reali

Why would you want to be a woman with a stash?