Dear @danielandangel, here is my entry for #WeeklyWritingContest:
Once upon a time in a far away magical monarchal kingdom, there was a magic dog named Magic Dog, and he was able to speak human words. When people would say "Speak!", he would literally and metaphorically say human words like "Hey toots, back that thing up to daddy" and stuff and things like that for real.
One day, the King summoned Magic Dog the magic dog to his castle (The King's castle, not Magic Dog's castle) and said "Why are you here??" and Maguc Dog got giga-confused and asked "You told me to come here."
Just then, the King's cook walked on Magic Dog and the King in bed together and exclaimed "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" and Magic Dog said "I can explain, your honor....." but the Cook replied "I don't want to hear any more of your LIES!" and Magic Dog just looked the Cook with his dog-like eyes. The Cook looked at the record player and yelled "Oh my god, you're listening to Eminem?" and Magic Dog said "I can explain, your honor....." but the Cook replied "I don't want to hear any more of your LIES!" and Magic Dog just looked the Cook with his dog-like eyes.
The King then intervened in the controvery, and said "I don't know, some of Em's new stuff is okay. Did you hear his verse on Godzilla?" and the Cook replied "Anybody can rap fast, even a mute! It's not impressive!!!! He just says a bunch of words without really saying anything!!!!!!!!!!1 HOW EMBARRASSING."
"I agree." Magic Dog retorted.
"Nobody has to know about this, right?" The King stammered. "I will give you half of my kingdom to never tell a single soul that we were listening to Eminem."
"Your majesty!" The Cook said, "There would be some serious, serious, serious reprecussions if you gave me half your kingdom. First of all, I have no administrative experience, and I am not charismatic and it's likely the people would not recognize me as a legitimate ruler and would almost certainly launch into a revolution that would end in them cutting my head off with a huge Arabic sword. I can't put that on my insta. It's not sexy. It's not me. This ain't it, fam."
"And second?" Magic Dog inquired, inquisitively.
"Second, people would ask some questions, like why you gave half of your goddamn fucking kingdom to your stupid ugly cook who is named Harold Spudburger, age 37. Sorry for swearing. I got really passionate for a second there. But the point remains; the truth will come out. After the revolution, when my head is in a basket, they will take my brain out of my head and then summon the 30 Witches of Haketh to form a circle around it and then it will start levitating and get really illuminated by light and my memories will be carved into the side of Mount Crimson, the red mountain of the east."
"Nice world-building you did there." Magic Dog replied. "You wove in those details about this world effortlessly, leaving the reader with a little bit of information, but wanting to know more, like why the 30 Witches of Haketh went into hiding for the last 100 years, and why Gorak The Wise said to never travel to Elfville."
"I never mentioned Gorak The Wise."
"Oh my goddess. I am SO embarrassed. D*RN IT."
Then Magic Dog got so embarrassed because he went past his embarrassment limit so he exploded and the whole land mourned for 16 days, each day for every
studio album that Eminem should not have released.
To be continued..............