I have had it up to here [I am gesturing toward my scarf] with the federal government's slow, inept response to the coronavirus outbreak.The clear solution to this problem is to give the feds more power. Trump is an absolute idiot, so we really need to make sure he has more totalitarian control over...
babylonbee.com
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STOCKHOLM—Greta Thunberg has come out to condemn the coronavirus outbreak, saying the virus callously ended the world ten years before climate change even had the chance to.As Thunberg is known for her fiery speeches and doomsday predictions about climate change, she began to worry that the spread o...
babylonbee.com
ROME—An Italian doctor has announced a new method for treating coronavirus, but not everyone is a believer. The doctor says he has cured many, many cases of the disease caused by the virus by throwing colored pills at them.His claims have drawn skepticism from the medical community, who have pointed...
babylonbee.com
ORLANDO, FL—The results of the coronavirus test came back: positive. For Wayne Lambert, this was a huge relief. Finally -- finally -- he could touch his face again.“Oh, I missed you!” Lambert said, his hands now going all over his eyes, nose, and chin.The CDC has warned everyone to stop touching the...
babylonbee.com
STOCKHOLM—Greta Thunberg has come out to condemn the coronavirus outbreak, saying the virus callously ended the world ten years before climate change even had the chance to.As Thunberg is known for her fiery speeches and doomsday predictions about climate change, she began to worry that the spread o...
babylonbee.com
ROME—An Italian doctor has announced a new method for treating coronavirus, but not everyone is a believer. The doctor says he has cured many, many cases of the disease caused by the virus by throwing colored pills at them.His claims have drawn skepticism from the medical community, who have pointed...
babylonbee.com
ORLANDO, FL—The results of the coronavirus test came back: positive. For Wayne Lambert, this was a huge relief. Finally -- finally -- he could touch his face again.“Oh, I missed you!” Lambert said, his hands now going all over his eyes, nose, and chin.The CDC has warned everyone to stop touching the...
babylonbee.com