Writing World Wednesday - Never Fear

A small fraction of people cares about you. 

Millions of other people do not. 

There's so much information out there these days that your voice is one of many shouting, "Me too!"

Which is why it's important never to hold yourself back. If you tone down a blog, an article or a chapter in a novel because you are afraid of speaking the truth and what others might think of you, readers will either not care or call you out for withholding stuff you did not put in. Yes, friends and family will give you high praise or take issue for what you got to say, but hopefully, you're not writing to impress them. 

If you convince the reader to spend time with you and not lead to a generic, bland piece of work, you must respect that they're giving all their finite hours to you. Whatever you say, it better be damned good. Here's something you can do the next time you are sitting in front of a blank page: Write your worst fears without scaring yourself. 

Write about accepting what scares you as a form of excellence that must be confronted. Explain in detail why you are afraid and then burn it. Then move towards one action or sentence at a time and edit later. When you publish your work, if you come across as preachy and caring, so be it. Angry and insensitive? Alrighty then. The whole point is to call your readers and convince them to spend 5 minutes or an hour with them. As long as it is honest, it will be far more engaging then holding back essential truth because you are worried about what others may think.

If you hand out information that you are hiding behind, why should I spend time with you? You know the type I'm talking about; promotional materials from the last bank statement or utility bill, the government documents, and healthcare information leaflets, and the guy next door leaving a note on your front door telling you to turn down the damn music because who knows what you might be doing. It's joyless, staid writing that falls passively and it comes from a world where nobody needs anything to anyone at any time. It belongs in the trash bin. 

So let's work this out together. I'm going to give you my time and you are going to give me your time. 

The best writers you and I know reveal some essential truth about the human condition and everyday life; the rest of us can at least learn about each other. I'm not saying you should write a sob story or a confessional for every piece, just don't make it an excuse to produce senseless copy that's devoid of a hole in the ground. Don't bore me with paragraphs of technical writing for a product or passive words nobody says. I've got a long steady job, studying to be a more competent writer and family commitments to keep. 

So, how can you solve this problem? 

Ireland's most famous writers, Christy Brown and the best American novelist and essayist of his generation David Foster Wallace, all struggled to get their works out while at the same time dealing with personal conflicts of their own. Christy had cerebral palsy all his life and was an alcoholic and grew up in a family who supported very little. Wallace was the smartest in his class and studied like mad, but was prone to drug use and severe depression. In his most incredible memoir "My Left Foot," Christy abandoned himself entirely to portraying what it was like growing up with cerebral palsy and how his disability lay in the reaction of those around him. Wallace described in his essay “E Unibus Pluram” the irony of television and how it impacts us as ordinary citizens (it's best if you can cut through the over-saturated words), including himself when talking about his insecurities. These two works are understated, but their power and honesty remain intact. Even if you are not intrigued, both authors have a glimpse into how they lived and what they saw.

We can all stop pretending and lose ourselves to an idea. We can learn from Brown and Wallace and other inspiring writers.

The only school subject I was good at was English. I was a daydreamer and I can hone my words throughout and spot obvious sentence structures just by looking at them (I was hyperactive and missed some mistakes and still do today). When my classmates and teachers told me to write a short story or if the next assignment was an essay on a specific subject, I was nervous. I procrastinated, thinking maybe playing video games and watching movies will help get me creative. 

I was wrong.

My old friends and teachers said they wanted to know more about what I was writing and the only excuse I gave was, "It's a work in progress," or "It's not that good, really." The real excuse I gave myself was, "I'm afraid of what everyone will think afterward." When I was in my early twenties I struggled to finish things. I wanted to write essays for writing clubs and websites, researched the subjects I was interested in and set them off to the side never to be touched again. Even short stories. The feedback I received from teachers, classmates and random users online was, at first, embarrassing to understand, but I kept them in my notes because I knew I had to finish what I started.  

Starting is tough. Diving down the rabbit hole can be meaningless, but also important. I create triggers. These include making coffee, disconnect the internet, put on music that is appropriate for the current mood, and setting a timer. My routine for becoming more productive involves this at the same time every morning. As a reward, I watch an internet video or television or go to the local bar with some friends. It's a ritual, a job description, a quest, and I don't think about the act of starting or fear of not finishing. This sounds boring, but it helps after a few tries. 

The thing to remember whenever you have trouble starting is to show up on time and do the work. Once you've learned this, consider it a privilege to write 10 or 20 minutes without distraction. The next day, aim for 30 or a whole chapter. Add a cliffhanger or a new character or obstacle. Talk about a new report from the news or an article you've researched. Even though I am a nobody on the internet, I still give myself permission to write because must start somewhere. Which is why you need to give yourself permission. You are not the only who struggles with this sort of fear.  

Set artificial deadlines and rewards and stick to them. Enter contests and submit them, gamify your writing tasks, make a commitment to tell your side of the story. As you practice this habit, it will be engrained in you and you'll forget about old habits that are meaningless. Like before, you don't have to write personally to the point where it reveals too much of yourself. Just make it like a car ride going from one town or city to the next, a lost civilization recently discovered and you are one of many to find it or go crazy about a conspiracy theory that can be true. Then let others judge it all in its ugly imperfections. It's better to be judged than to be ignored. 

And of course, let rejection come to you. There's no way around it, so you might as well learn from it because you can greatly improve yourself.

You must write today.

You must write as if your life depended on it.

Because it does.