[Semi-True Story] A Giant Problem by @ReapersHorror

I work at a grocery store and I have a problem. My problem isn't the store, the customers, or even the people I work with. I have a much bigger problem, a giant problem, particularly the green kind. Yes, my problem is with the Jolly Green Giant. That smiling face of his is there just to mock me all day. Watching me, waiting to jump out at me on nearly every can of green beans, laughing as I have to rotate the cans again and again. 

He is evil incarnate. The devil in green. Lord of isle two, and surveyor of the produce section. And he is not alone. He brings with him a son, boy of the large noggin. Sprout, as he is known as by his worshipers.  Soon he will rise, like his father and destroy all hope for mankind. Every man, woman, and child will be crushed under their rule. Fear them for that time is soon!