Wednesday Jokes!

Brown Paper Jake....

A sheriff walks into a saloon, and shouts for everyone's attention. 

"Has anyone seen Brown paper Jake?", he asks. 



"What's he look like?", asks one shoddy looking cowboy. 



"Well", replies the Sheriff, "he wears a brown paper hat, a brownpaper waistcoat, a brown paper shirt, brown paper boots, brown paper pants, and a brown paper jacket." 



"So what's he wanted for?", asks the same cowboy. 



"Rustlin'...", replies the Sheriff.

The Indian

Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that Indian?"

 

"Yeah," says the other cowboy. 



"Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction." 



Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says, "about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon." 



"Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!" 



The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a half hour ago."

Master engineer

There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. 

Several years later the company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multimillion dollar machines. 

They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine to work but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past. 

The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. 

He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day, he marked a small "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and stated, "This is where your problem is". 



The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again. 

The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. 



The engineer responded briefly:


- One chalk mark $1


- Knowing where to put it $49,999 



The bill was paid in full.